Most private therapists in London offer a free initial consultation before you commit to working together. It's typically fifteen to thirty minutes, by phone or video, and it's one of the most useful things in the process of finding the right therapist.

But many people don't know quite what to expect from these conversations, what they're supposed to be doing during them, or how to evaluate the outcome. This guide explains what a good initial consultation involves—from both sides of the conversation—and how to use it effectively.

What the Consultation Is For

A free consultation serves several purposes simultaneously.

For you:

To get a sense of whether this therapist feels like someone you could talk to
To understand their approach and whether it fits what you're looking for
To ask practical questions (about fees, availability, how they work)
To have a first chance to describe what brings you to therapy, and see how it's received

For the therapist:

To understand broadly what you're dealing with and whether they can help
To assess whether they have availability that suits you
To identify whether there are any specific needs that they can't meet (in which case, a good therapist will signpost you to someone more appropriate)
To get a sense of whether the therapeutic relationship might work

The consultation is a two-way assessment. You are not being interviewed—you are interviewing too.

What a Good Consultation Looks Like

A good initial consultation is warm, unhurried (within its time constraints), and genuinely curious. The therapist should listen more than they talk. They should ask questions that help them understand your situation, and give you space to describe it in your own words.

You should leave the consultation with:

A clear sense of what working with this person might feel like
Answers to your practical questions
A feeling about whether you want to take the next step

You shouldn't feel rushed, pressured, or as though you've been assessed and found wanting. You also shouldn't leave feeling confused about their approach or uncertain about what the next step would be.

A consultation is not a full therapy session. You will not solve your problems in fifteen minutes, and you shouldn't expect to. But you can get a meaningful read on whether this person might be right for you.

What to Say

Many people find the initial consultation slightly daunting, partly because they're not sure what to say or how much to share. A few things that help:

Prepare a brief summary of what brings you to therapy. You don't need a polished narrative—just enough to give the therapist a sense of what's going on. Something like: "I've been struggling with anxiety for the past year. It's started to affect my work and my relationship, and I'd like some support to understand it better and change things." That's plenty.

You don't need to share everything. The consultation is not the place to go into full depth about trauma, complex history, or sensitive material. A therapist who pushes you to share more than feels comfortable in a fifteen-minute introduction is not demonstrating good practice. Trust your sense of how much you want to share.

It's fine to say you don't know. If the therapist asks what kind of therapy you're looking for and you genuinely don't know, say so. Part of their job is to help you understand what might be useful for you.

Share your practical constraints. Be clear about your budget, availability, and any other relevant practicalities (online vs. in-person preference, whether you need evening sessions, etc.). This prevents wasted time on both sides.

What to Ask

The consultation is your chance to ask whatever would help you decide. Some useful questions:

About their experience:

"What kinds of issues do you work with most often?"
"Have you worked with [anxiety / grief / relationship difficulties / trauma, etc.] before?"
"What's your experience with [specific issue] specifically?"

About their approach:

"How would you describe your approach to therapy?"
"What does a typical session look like with you?"
"Are you more directive or do you tend to follow the client's lead?"

About practical matters:

"What are your fees, and do you offer a sliding scale or concessions?"
"What are your cancellation and rescheduling policies?"
"Do you offer online sessions as well as in-person?"
"How long do people typically work with you?"

About the working relationship:

"What would you say is most important in your work with clients?"
"How do you approach it if a client feels the therapy isn't working?"

There's no need to ask all of these. Pick the ones most relevant to your situation and what you most need to understand.

The Most Important Thing to Notice

More important than any specific answer is the overall quality of the exchange—whether the therapist listens well, whether you feel genuinely heard, whether their responses feel attuned to what you've actually said, and whether there's something that feels like warmth and human connection.

These qualities matter enormously in therapy. They're also difficult to manufacture. You will likely be able to sense whether they're present in even a short consultation, if you pay attention.

Notice also how you feel after the call. Do you feel slightly more settled, slightly clearer, slightly curious about the next step? Or do you feel unsettled, misunderstood, or vaguely uneasy? Your bodily and emotional response to the conversation is data.

When to Move On

You might decide after a consultation that you'd like to work with someone different. This is completely fine and you don't owe the therapist an explanation. Common reasons people decide not to continue include:

Something about the therapist's manner didn't feel right—too formal, too quick, not warm enough
Their approach doesn't sound like what you need
Their fees are out of your range
Their availability doesn't work with yours
The therapist indicated they're not the right fit for your specific needs

A good therapist will not be offended or pressuring if you decide not to continue after a consultation. Their interest is in you finding the right support—even if that isn't them.

How Many Consultations Should You Have?

There's no fixed answer, but it's reasonable to consult with two or three therapists before deciding. Particularly if you've not been in therapy before, having a point of comparison helps you understand what's possible and what feels right.

That said, endless consulting can become its own form of avoidance. If you've had several consultations and keep finding reasons not to commit to anyone, it's worth examining whether something else is going on—anxiety about starting, ambivalence about therapy itself, or perhaps a genuine difficulty trusting enough to commit to the process.

After the Consultation

If you want to continue with a particular therapist, the usual next step is to book an initial session—which is typically a fuller assessment session, paid at the usual rate. This gives both of you more time to explore what the work might focus on and whether the therapeutic relationship feels workable.

If you're unsure after the consultation, it's fine to say so: "I'm considering a few different therapists—can I get back to you within the week?" Most therapists will hold a provisional slot for a short time, though they may not hold it indefinitely.

A Note on Free Therapy in London

If you're looking for subsidised or free therapy (rather than a free consultation as part of a paid therapy process), there are separate resources:

NHS Talking Therapies (formerly IAPT): Free CBT-based therapy for anxiety and depression. Self-refer online or ask your GP.
Mind: Offers counselling and support, some at reduced cost
Samaritans: Free listening support for anyone in distress (116 123)
BACP student membership clinics: Many therapists in training offer low-cost or free sessions under supervision
Charity/sector services: Various charities offer free or subsidised therapy for specific groups (e.g., survivors of domestic violence, people with specific mental health diagnoses)

I offer free 15-minute phone or video consultations to anyone considering working with me. It's a chance to understand your situation, explain how I work, and assess whether there might be a good fit—with no pressure and no commitment. Book your free consultation and let's see whether working together might help.

Free Therapy Consultations in London: What to Expect and How to Make the Most of Them